The Missing Link

 Found: The most important and missing link to the Santiago family tree.

Yesterday I was googling pictures for my Women in White page, when I came upon a very interesting article on the pirate Cofresi. Upon further reading I found that Cofresi's mother was of the Ramirez de Arellano family of Cabo Rojo.  Cofresi didn't have any children of his own to carry on his name.  His only son died very young. As for Cofresi's two brothers, after the infamous feats their younger brother pulled off, they most likely preferred not to be associated to the Cofresi name and so opted (with good reason, I should add) to use their mother's name instead.

One of Cofresi's nephews or grandnephews (I'm not sure, as I need to do more research), married a young girl by the last name of Roselle. Lorenza, or Lorencita, died of typhus fever at the early age of eighteen. Her father was Antonio Roselle, a colonel in the Spanish army stationed in Guayama, in the southern part of the island.  Antonio was born around 1820, married  Juana Josefa who bore him three daughters but no sons. 

Antonio met Bernardina Batista the young daughter of Jose and Mercedes Batista later on in life.  She must have fallen in love with the distinguished officer enough to risk getting pregnant and bearing him a son, an illegimate son which she named Juan Anacleto. 

Records show that Anacleto was born in July of 1880. Antonio was close to 60 then.  As an officer of the elite Spanish army, we're certain that he couldn't  afford to be mixed up in an extramarital affair or much less beget illegitimate children. At her age, his beautiful young lover  gave birth to a son. But because of the particulars expressed above, Bernardina chose to baptize her son by herself. There is no record of the father, nor any information pertaining to his whereabouts. The fact that he was Spanish, would explain why he wasn't found in any of the island's demographic registries. 

That illegitimate son of Col. Antonio Rosell, was none other than our beloved grandfather, Anacleto Santiago, Mom's dad who loved his children especially his Gandulito with an unconditional love.  Read my book The Women in White. 

Records show that Bernardina later took a husband by the name of Jose de Santiago. It would make sense that her firstborn illegitimate son  should take the name of his stepfather. 

In summary, Papa's sister Lorencita Roselle, was married to a nephew or grandnephew of the famous pirate Cofresi who stole from the rich  to give to the poor.  Papa would have been either the nephew or grandnephew of Cofresi the pirate from Cabo Rojo.  Throughout the history of our family there have been many links between Guayama and Cabo Rojo.

It turns out that our family is in some twist of fate somewhat related to Cofresi.  All this is documented and not a figment of my imagination.  I have all the records to prove everything I write here.  I have been diligently working on our family tree for almost two years , but I gave up the search for our great granddad, Antonio Roselle, a year ago when Mom passed away.

What a coincidence that this information was made known to me only three days before Mom's one year anniversary. Coincidence?  I don't  think so. I truly believe this was Mom's gift to us before she leaves once-and-for-all for her eternal dwelling place.  After all, she was my biggest supporter when I was working on our family tree, and would spend endless hours on the phone with me trying to help me piece our family history.  She wanted to know who her grandfather was, as much as I did.  

Mom, this one is for you!  You never did cease to amaze me!  Thank you from all of us your children, grandchildren, nieces and nephews for this last truly and unique gift! I will love you always and forever!

Sent from my iPhone

Dunscomb and Jacinto

Dunscomb and Jacinto, a true story…..

The idea that anyone on the planet is connected to any other person through a chain of acquaintances with no more than five links (six degrees) has been referred to as "six degrees of separation" as well as the "small world" phenomenon.

        As some of you may know, our family was blessed with a healthy and handsome baby boy two years ago. Jack's parents gave him the middle name of Dunscomb, after his paternal grandfather Edward Dunscomb, a respectable lawyer from upstate New York. 

Aside from both maternal grandparents coming from Puerto Rico, Baby Dunscomb has yet another interesting connection to Borinquen. 

        That New Year's Eve, when I visited my baby grandson, my son-in-law related a story his father had told him and produced a typed document to prove the story.

        After graduating from Columbia, Edward Dunscomb, Baby Dunscomb’s great, great grandparent, was sent to Borinquen. The purpose of the visit was to fill the family company schooner with rum, molasses, and sugar to bring back to the States. Young Dunscomb tells an interesting story of how Jacinto Texidor, the plantation owner, befriended the Columbia graduate, becoming extremely fond of him and inviting him to stay in his home whenever he visited the island. He also tells how Jacinto who came from the humblest of beginnings, came to own one of the richest plantations in Puerto Rico. It’s a fascinating story, which I think you might enjoy reading.

        Which brings me to my point. What a small world! We’re all so interconnected. To think that a story from the year 1830 would have such a direct connection to our baby grandson, is to me, quite remarkable.

        I’ve attached Edward Dunscomb’s personal story in a separate link for those interested in reading the document in it’s entirety.  

        Click on the link below to read on, then you be the judge.  https://www.dunscombe.info/e1422.htm

Israel at war

I think of my three favorite countries in the world.

They are Puerto Rico, Israel and Ireland in that order. Why I ask are these relatively small countries my favorite? For one, there are the sentimental attachments. Second, the beauty found in all three. And then there are their stories. Stories of how they’ve managed to survive and stay afloat. 

This week has been especially difficult thinking of what’s going on in Israel. It’s hard to see the beautiful people of Israel killed by Hamas and Hezbollah. The places I visited destroyed beyond imagination

I can only pray and continue to pray for peace in Israel and surrounding Palestine.  

Unloading my pics

It’s a problem keeping pics because you can’t seem to be able to part with them. After all, a picture is worth a thousand words, so goes the saying.

Well last night I came across my own Cristina’s blog Life According to Cristina where she said something about using the blog to unload some pics. What a brilliant idea. 

And, it seems that almost everywhere one goes these days, you’re bound to hear upsetting news. 

One thing that brings me joy is looking back at pictures of good times. So I thought Cristina’s idea sounded great. Reminiscing brings joy to the heart and what a better way to reminisce than by looking at pictures. 

Not that I’m anywhere close to being a professional photographer, but all my photos are important to me, as I’m sure your pictures are also just as important to you. 

I came across a couple I took this week. Pics of our backyard and I decided maybe start with these. 

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again….

A new year a new set of challenges. Just as you’ve put away the last of the Christmas decor, it starts. The mail picks up again but of a different kind. W-2 forms start pouring in. New files have to be set up to accommodate the influx of mail; and so tax season begins. 

On top of that, all projects that have been put on the back burner resurface, each with a higher priority than the other. 

Because it’s not enough to deal with new year resolutions and debt accumulated over the holidays, we then have to deal with new challenges—that’s not to mention possible new breakdowns in the systems. 

So for me, the new challenge is to fix a roof that had one tile blow away several years ago, and which I thought I could put on hold for a while. Well, it escaped my mind, or at least I chose not to think about it, but lo and behold it came back to bite me in the arse as soon as the new year rolled in. Raindrops trickling down the bedroom ceiling and down the wall slapped me wide-awake in the face and now I have to address the issue PRONTO. 

Life, it’s never easy, and the older one gets the harder life gets. 

Here’s to another year and another set of challenges. I have no one to blame for this last one but myself; but I find that it’s always after I’ve had a jolly good time that I’m hit with the worst.

Hopefully, you gentle readers faired better than I did. 

Hasta la vista, everyone !

When will life feel normal again?

During the Covid pandemic, most people lost at least one or several family members or close friends. Among other family members, we lost a brave young man in the prime age of thirty-two. It was an excruciating situation all around with anxiety running high. Medical personnel were short-staffed, and life-saving medicine and equipment were scarce and in high demand. So many loved ones died because of the lack thereof. 

Because of the dire situation, the lack of personnel meant lack of food and other product deliveries. There were all types of shortages.

Not to sound heartless or focus on inane things, we were not immune to such loses, adding to a breakdown of the heating/air conditioning system, refrigerator and stove. Bad situations worsened by the lack of proper repairmen not making house calls. 

Two years after the Covid pandemic, I still don’t have proper working appliances. From day one, the new Cosmo range has been slowly falling apart. The gas ignitions click, it seems forever, before the flames appear and stay lit. My lungs have gotten used to blowing on the ignition to get the flame started and stay lit. But the one thing that broke the camel’s back was one  of the grates cracked  in three places. 

I did what any normal customer would—I reached out to Cosmo to ask them to replace the broken grate. Instead of apologizing for the poor craftsmanship of their product and offering to replace it, they advised me to place an order for a new grate at a price of $150. Needless to say, I was appalled. No amount of diplomacy on my part changed their attitude—the part broke of wear and tear and is not under warranty, answered the company rep. 

In hindsight, I paid close to $3,000 for a new product, and after only 2 years and 2 months it broke down at my expense. 

Wiktionary defines the phrase “alternate universe” as a hypothetical world situated in a different dimension of space and time than the real world consisting of the universe known and experienced by human beings. I feel like I’m living in an alternate universe. 

We’re still suffering both the real and side effects of the pandemic. 

Does anyone else feel this way?

Kyrchyszstan

What a pleasant surprise I just received. I had been so preoccupied with my nephew’s illness and death, I hadn’t had a chance to open it. How blessed am I? Thank you to my friends Miriam and Matthew for their thoughtfulness. I still don’t know what’s inside the beautiful and interesting gift box but it looked like chocolates inside. I love it. And the disinfectant, I admit it took me a while to figure it out but I thought it ingenious. This gift means more to me than many I’ve received over the years. Plus it opened up a new thirst for all things Kyrchyszstan. Now I can almost understand why my friend Matthew is not rushing to leave that country. He is a UN diplomat working out of this beautiful breathtaking place. From the pictures on the web the place is like from a storybook, almost magical. Thanks again, my friend. You made my year! 

I’ve posted some of the pictures I found on the web. My words could never do justice to such a magnificent place hence the photos. Enjoy. 

Love,

Sylvia 

Happy Spring!

Happy Spring, Everyone!

Spring is here and that’s reason enough to celebrate. It's almost the end of March and three weeks from Easter. After that, time will fly and before we know it'll be summer.

Get out there and smell the air, gazed upon the buds, listen to the chirping of the birds and try to slow down time.

But how does one slow the days?

As we age, obviously we know our time on earth is dwindling and we want to accomplish those things we've put on the back burner, things we keep telling ourselves we will eventually take care of but which we never do. Our brain tricks us into believing we have time. But do we really? That's trickery, and unless we snap out of that mentality, we will remain stagnant, wishing we could tackle whatever it is we need to do.

I know, I know. It can be overwhelming. Worrying can zap the energy out of us, especially if we're already dealing with other stuff such as illness, emotional hurts, financial difficulty, etc. There's a slew of incidentals we could be dealing with, and that doesn't make it any easier. But, rejoice. As long as we have life in us, there is hope for us. Remember, hope springs eternal and Spring is proof of that. 

Easter is a time for new beginnings, but we don't have to wait for Easter to start on our to-do list. With God all things are possible. Plus Rome wasn't built in one day. The trick is to start small.

Every year I say the same thing. My biggest project is emptying out the house's four levels, basement, first and second floors, and attic. But my biggest obstacle is my health. Do I use my poor health and lack of energy as an excuse, or do I try to tackle a bit at a time? 

Sometimes our lives affect others and we need to be mindful of that as well when we make plans. But with the right attitude and with God on our side all things are possible.

In the meantime, while you’re trying to figure life out, go for a stroll and take in life. Let it seep in slowly and savor it as you breathe in and breathe out. And always let God guide you.

Happy Spring, you all!

102 y/o Dancer Sees Herself on Film for the First Time

New Jersey (1940s)

Snap Krackle 'n Pop!: Unexpected beauty!

Snap Krackle 'n Pop!: Unexpected beauty!: Every spring day until summer I wait in anticipation of what Mother Nature has prepared for us in the backyard.  Ours may not be a carefully...

Unexpected beauty!

Every spring day until summer I wait in anticipation of what Mother Nature has prepared for us in the backyard. 

Ours may not be a carefully and lovingly tendered garden like those of England, but it is beautiful indeed and I’m always awed by such beauty with so little care. 

This year was more beautiful than ever with new blooms and fragrant smells some which I’d not experienced before —because of the pandemic, Earth got a bit of a fighting chance and we were richly rewarded in the process.

I must always remember that God’s in control.

Reflection on the virus

Reflection on this crisis. 

By now, most of us should pretty much be used to the government-imposed state of staying home or being quarantined. 

I’m sure that for some of us it’s been a time of reflection. Let’s think about this for a second and try to figure out what God is trying to tell us. 

As a Christian, I strongly believe that God’s hand is in every situation—this present situation we’re undergoing is no exception. True that sadly we’ve lost thousands worldwide, and more cases continue to pop up. But we need to trust that God is in control of our lives and that He’ll see us through this most terrible ordeal, just as He has in previous ones. 

My deepest condolences go out to all who have lost loved ones and to all who are sick with little hope of survival. May all who died be resting in God’s arms. 

I’m sure I’m going to get some criticism here, but I’m going to go out on a limb anyway. As in every dire situation, maybe we should try to see the rainbow behind the dark clouds, because God calls us to be joyful even in the face of death. 

May God keep us strong and positive.

Let’s study the situation and pretend for a second that there’s no deadly virus hanging over our heads. Pretend for a second that we’re living in an alternative universe. An alternative universe, where people stay home and get paid to do so.

Where families spend precious time together—parents with children and vice versa, sharing meals around the table, taking up new hobbies or renewing old ones, spring cleaning or actually disinfecting their homes. Adult children taking more attention to their elderly’s needs—rising to the occasion in new and positive ways.

Families through out the world interacting in a way like never before—frolicking in the backyard, playing favorite games, indoors listening to music, dancing.

The young taking care of the elderly. The elderly’s needs being met by loving individuals, be they family or strangers.

Families actually staying home instead of at the malls spending their hard-earned money on another unnecessary item; dads entertaining their little ones instead of hanging out at the local bar; siblings sharing time with one another reconnecting again.

Who would have thought that social media would actually be embraced the way it’s been embraced, keeping us emotionally connected while physically disconnected? Never in the history of the world have we been more connected emotionally and spiritually.

Does this sound like a somewhat utopian way of life? You bet it does! 

So I ask you, do you think God is trying to tell us something?

Comments are welcomed, but please no bashing and no politics.  

Better to laugh than cry

During the lockdown —

It’s always better to look at the bright side.

1. while grocery stores are taking weeks, sometimes months, to deliver, liquor wholesalers are delivering in a matter of days. We might die of hunger, but I can almost bet we’ll have a smile on our face!
2. kitchens have been turned into labs—mayo is being substituted for eggs, coconut oil for butter, pancake mix for flour, and that’s just for starters. I’m keeping my fingers crossed that all this experimenting doesn’t blow up in my face?!
3. when toilet paper finally crashed under the weight of the virus, counterparts tissues, napkins, and paper towels stepped up to the plate. In the meantime, something that rarely happens, trees are starting to sweat?!
4. teenagers, who normally want nothing to do with their parents, now clamor for their attention. It took a virus to get them out of their rooms and at the dinner table.
5. doggies are very confused of late. Thoughts run the gamut, ‘what’d you do with my mom?’ (Mine was younger and prettier.) What?! You’re not leaving me, again? Or, hold it, hold it! You want to share my doggie path?!And, Aaargh! when do I get my sofa back?
6. Ever notice how people are acting more and more like their dogs and vice versa. Now, if I hear the slightest sound outside, I run excitedly to the front window to see who is the brave one going for a walk around the block, or a jog up and down the hill. 
7. Seriously, all kidding aside, laughter is the best medicine. Now is that a conundrum or what?
8. When life gives you lemons, don’t just make lemonade. Make lemon meringue pie, lemon bars, lemon snaps and freeze them. Better to freeze baked goods than lemons. 

Snap Krackle 'n Pop!: Amsterdam 2 Medium

Snap Krackle 'n Pop!: Amsterdam 2 Medium

Remembering Mom’s Last Days

My last visit with Mom
(Written on the 12th of September of 2013, exactly eight months after Mom went home to the Lord.)

Several days ago, I posted a picture of Mom and Crissy on Facebook. It was taken at her youngest grandson’s wedding the year before.  As I studied her face in that picture, I could see the pain that Mom was already enduring but keeping to herself. Paradoxically, while that day was one of the happiest days in her life, it was also probably one of the worst, in terms of the physical pain she was going through. And just as important, of not being able to fully partake of such a joyful event.

 I had to take her outside and away from the music her head hurt so much.

Looking back on the days leading up to what should have been one of her happiest, the night before the wedding she insisted on waiting up for Cristina and moi, who had flown in for the joyful event. Our plane landed late that Friday evening; it took forever to get our car rental; and then we got stuck in the worst traffic on Route 52. 

If I had known of Mom’s accelerating feeble state, I would have made other arrangements to avoid her additional stress that night.

As she was in the habit of doing she had cooked for us and was anxiously waiting for us to get home and eat. I tried to convince her over the phone, to go to bed and that we would see her the next day.

It was close to midnight when we finally arrived at Mom’s. She was still up waiting for us. After the hugs and the kisses, she went into the kitchen to serve us arroz con gandules and pasteles: the meal she had lovingly prepared for us, undoubtedly with some effort. It broke my heart. I also understood that she was making a real effort to stay up past her bedtime to welcome us home.

The next day after breakfast the three of us drove into town for some last minute shopping. Mom was genuinely happy as we encircled the Cabo Rojo plaza, going from store to store looking for a pair of sunglasses and the perfect pair of shoes for her to wear to the wedding. She reminded me of a teenager looking for the perfect accessories for a special event. I’ll never forget the look of contentment on her face when we finally found her shoes. Having checked off everything on our list we headed back home, not before indulging our taste buds to the tasty chicken tacos and fries at Taco Maker in the on La 100 only minutes away from the house.

As the three generations of women enjoyed precious quality time over lunch, I witnessed a sense of peace in her demeanor. Yet I also detected a faraway look in her eyes, one which I can only describe as her being in two places at once—elated to be sharing this special moment with her daughter and granddaughter but also wary about a bleak future. For some time I tried putting myself in her situation, and wondered what she must be thinking or going through as she neared 90.

A week later Mom and I went back to Taco Maker—we both love the fast food they serve. After lunch we drove to Mayaguez Mall to exchange the nightgown I brought her as a gift from home. She chose one I thought more whimsical which I didn’t think was as nice; one I thought didn’t seem to fit her classic style. Nonetheless, I respected her choice and was happy for her.

I like to believe that Mom and I shared a special bond, as I’m sure she also had with my older and younger sisters. I would like to believe that our relationship was unlike the bond she shared with Kimi and Elba, which makes perfect sense since we are three different people with different personalities. Yet deep in my heart, I suspected that Mom probably wished she had been more like me—the rebel in the family. With me, she felt free to say whatever was on her mind. And I appreciated that. I welcomed her sincerity and prided myself in the fact that she could feel that comfortable around me.

On her last visit to River Edge, she made me cry over something she said to me.  I was dyeing her hair and she was not happy with the color. I should mention that I can’t remember Mom ever saying anything to make me cry like that.  

She brought me to tears that time—tears of hurt—of her subconsciously comparing me to my younger sister. 

Looking back I realize it was never Mom’s intention to hurt me. The fact is those tears of mine had been building up inside me for months, at the sense of loss of my once youthful and spry mother. Of anticipating having to say goodbye to her sooner than I could imagine. Of me not having enough patience with my dear and elderly parent, when all she did was point out in her innocent way how Kimi always did her hair and never complained, while I could never hide my dislike at doing anyone’s hair. 

Except for doing my girls’ hair when they were little, doing anyone’s hair is not my favorite thing to do.  And Mom’s hair was no exception. In my defense I have a hard enough time doing my own hair. I was so annoyed with her comparison that I lashed out, “Yes, I know, Kimi is perfect.” Then I broke down and cried like I’d never cried over anything before.

It never occurred to me that Mom might be looking for attention from me but was probably going about it the wrong way.  

I eventually apologized for my outburst. Mom, however, was not moved. And she never apologized, at least not formally. Obviously with me, Mom was free to say whatever was on her mind. Apparently she didn’t think it necessary to apologize, because when people love each other words are sometimes redundant. And like the famous line from Love Story, “Love is never having to say you’re sorry!” After a couple of hours of I licking my emotional wounds, I was okay and Mom and I were buddies again.

That was the kind of relationship Mom and I had. I always tried to remember that she didn’t have much time left on earth. She was 88, only two years away from the big 90. And, how many people live to be 90, and in Mom’s case, still look as good?

Mom’s longevity and good genes were a blessing from God. Her children and grandchildren were blessed to have her genes. I reminded my girls that we should cherish every second we had with her, and that’s what we did.

At Karen and BB’s beach wedding, Mom complained of a splitting head pain. My heart ached for her. I tried putting myself in her shoes and realize what a huge sacrifice she must be making to be present for her grandchildren. The air-conditioning crashed on that tropical August night. The stifling heat and insufferable humidity were too much. In spite of my light summer dress, I perspired as if I’d been working under a scorching sun all day, and could only imagine what Mom herself was going through. I turned to see the pained face then quietly led her out to the terrace facing the ocean, where we sat and talked for hours.

Mom looked absolutely beautiful that night in a royal blue sequined ensemble that Kimi had picked out for her; and she wore the comfortable shoes that Crissy and I got for her earlier. And guess what? I did her hair in an up-do, just as nice as Kimi would have done.  And I didn’t complain—as a matter of fact, I was elated to do her hair.

Mom and I shared some beautiful stories that night. After having the dinner that was brought out to us, she asked if I would take her back to our hotel room. Back at the room I helped her into bed and decided not to return to the wedding so as to keep watch over her. Upon her insistence, however, I returned to get us a piece of cake.

That night I lost my favorite pair of shoes, a pair of gold strappy high-heel sandals—a fact that upset me for weeks. Looking back, nothing mattered now; not even missing out on my nephew’s wedding, or losing my shoes. The only thing that matter was giving Mom the attention and the company she needed right there and then. 

When I returned with the mouthwatering cake, Mom who never went to bed without her tea and sometimes a light snack, wouldn’t get up to have the cake, asking that I save her piece. She would have it the next day, she said.

My recollection of that next day and the following 21 days that followed, are as vivid as the computer sitting in front of me. Somehow Mom knew, as well as I also knew in the back of my head, that we would never get back this precious time. In essence, it was God’s special gift to both of us, one I will eternally be grateful for. Though never enough time, this was a chance to bitter-sweetly etch my last days with Mom forever in my heart. 

I love you Mom, always and forever. 

because life doesn't stop or wait for anyone....

It's already the end of March and three weeks from Easter. After that, time will again fly and before we know it it'll be summer.

How does one slow the days?

As we age obviously we know our time on earth is dwindling and we want to accomplish those things we've put on the back burner, things we keep telling ourselves we will eventually take care of but which we never do. Our brain tricks us into believing we have time. But do we really? That's trickery and unless we snap out of that mentality, we will remain stagnant, wishing we could tackle whatever it is we need to do.

I know, I know. It can be overwhelming. It can zap the energy out of us, especially if we're already dealing with other stuff such as illness, emotional hurts, financial difficulty, etc. There's a slew of incidentals we could be dealing with, and that doesn't make it any easier. But, rejoice. As long as we have life in us, there is hope for us.

Easter is a time for new beginnings, but we don't have to wait for Easter to start on our to-do list. With God all things are possible. Plus, Rome wasn't built in one day. The trick is to start small.

My biggest project is emptying out the house's four levels, basement, first and second floors, and attic. But my biggest obstacle is my health. Do I use my poor health and lack of energy as an excuse, or do I try to tackle a bit at a time. A good friend accomplished that which I've been trying to do for years; but she lives alone and doesn't have to account to anyone for anything she does.

Sometimes our lives affect others and we need to be mindful of that as well. But with the right attitude and with God on our side all things are possible.

Below are some pictures of last Spring's project: I, myself, alone, converted the side porch I'd been using as a warehouse into a guestroom. With God's help, I plan to clean to clean out the attic and basement, or at least one of them this Spring.

What's on your to do list? Do you want to visit the pyramids of Egypt, write a book. Possibly get that Masters in your field. Don't be dissuaded, go for it because time doesn't stop or wait for anyone.

A New Year......

A New Year--A new me!

Really? Come on. Yes, we all make resolutions in the New Year; sometimes so silently that only our hearts hear it. And sometimes we proclaim it to the world.

I've never been one to make resolutions--it gives me a headache to not follow through, so I don't bother. Yet, as contradictory as it sounds, I want to become healthier and live a more productive life. That's not much to ask, but it's a start. So let's start with little things and tell it to ourselves and no one else. No one has to know if we break our resolutions.

Here's to the New Year--a new you, a new me full of promises. With God all things are possible.

Venice Trip 2009

Roy Brown interpreta Boricua en la Luna en Estás Invitado